You know those Wish ads on Facebook, weird shit for a buck or two, shipped from who knows where? You can get Nicolas Cage on a pillow, knickers with cushions built in, everything you never wanted, if you’re willing to wait a few weeks.

Ever wonder who buys that shit? Well, it’s me. Me. I buy that shit, and I make it scary, ’cause that’s what I do.

(It’s just, my mother threw out my horrible fuzzy coat. I needed something for loafing about the house, and this is what I came up with.)

Here’s what it really looks like, without the creep-ass lighting:

I must say, for some bargain shit off the Internet, it’s comfy as hell. A+; would Wish again.